Wow! I am overwhelmed by the support and advice that everyone has given. I don’t know why I am…I should be used to your unwavering friendship by now.
After Noodle blogged earlier, Greg and I decided that we were going to try to find Molly a new home now rather than wait until another incident occurred as re-homing never happens fast.
As I shared with my friends on Facebook:
After a horrible experience last night between Molly and Noodle, Greg and I have decided it would be best for Molly if we could find a home for her where she’d be the only dog.
Please don’t think this decision was made in haste. My heart is breaking. If you know me, you know my dogs are more important to me than my own life.
We’ve been monitoring her behavior for 3 months now and it seems to be deteriorating. At times it’s completely unprovoked. Other times it’s normal stuff like resource guarding. We can’t risk either of their lives. Her life IS at risk. If Greg wasn’t in the room last night, Molly would’ve killed Noodle and she would’ve ended up euthanized.
She is an attention hog who does everything to please her humans. Unfortunately, she sees the other dogs as threats because they take attention away from her. She also has a serious prey drive which is why she can’t live with cats. We believe she was used as a hunting dog. She listens to commands and submits almost immediately. Possibly as a result of past abuse.
So, if you have a home without dogs or cats, and you’d be willing to open it up to a truly incredible dog, please message me or Greg.
Please do not misunderstand me. If I had the funds to hire a pet behaviorist I would in a heartbeat. But remember how I had to raise money just to get her initial medical care? It’s a struggle every month to make sure all the dogs get their preventatives. There are no extra funds to put towards a trainer or other specialist at this time. Not to mention I leave for work at 7 am, get home at 7 pm, and am in bed by 10 pm. How much time do I have to devote to strict, detailed training, while still caring for the other dogs, cat, birds, chickens, duck, rabbits, etc.?
When we first brought Molly home as a foster, I truly didn’t believe she would be with us long-term. Not because of the foster situation but because I thought she was old and sick. I thought we were going to help a senior live out the end of her days. Yes, I adopted her once I knew more but that’s because she was already part of the family and I didn’t realize we were going to have such serious problems just weeks ahead.
Anyway, after posting to Facebook, I realized that Molly’s behavior is similar to how Khia got during the last months of her life: We took her to the vet in February because she was starting to act grumpy (growling, snarling at Noodle). She was misdiagnosed as having arthritis instead of the cancer which was too far gone by the time the proper diagnosis came.
Because of that experience (which I never want to live through again), Greg and I took Molly to the vet today for blood work. She had a CBC which we will have the results of Monday, and an add-on thyroid test (more than just the typical thyroid test…I can’t recall what it is) which we will have the results of by Wednesday. As soon as I told them what was going on they said she’s at the perfect age for and exhibiting signs of possible hypothyroidism (i.e., sudden aggression that increases rapidly).
I do not want to give up on Molly. Aside from breaking my heart, I’m sure it would devastate her AND Macy who thinks the world of her. That being said, if it’s not something medically fixable, I can’t afford to give her the proper care she needs to “get better” and it would be irresponsible of me to keep her as far as everyone’s safety goes.
I dug myself in a hole and I’m trying to get out. The losses of Mya and then Khia wreaked havoc on my life. I’ve been trying to make things work/improve since then but sometimes I make crappy decisions. Keeping Molly if I can’t care for her will NOT be one of those crappy decisions I make. I will make things right somehow.
I’m so sorry, I’ve followed your journey with Molly and it’s breaking my heart, too. But I know that you’ll only give her to a good home, not back to the shelter. Sometimes letting go is the only thing you can do to help.
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I will NEVER send her back to the shelter. I promised her the day she came home that no matter what, if never send her back. Thank you for your reassuring words.
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I for one feel very relieved about this decision. I hope for the best for Molly. A one dog home will be best for her. I hope someone steps up quickly. I hope you’re feeling better, Noodle. Stay close to your daddy so he can keep you safe and watch carefully about your cut while it heals.
Love and licks,
Cupcake
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I feel relief until I think about handing her leash to someone else and saying goodbye to her. I know it’s the right thing to do but it feels awful. Disgustingly awful.
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I feel you you. YOu are really caught between a rock and hard place. You are trying to do the best for everyone and somewhere along the line something as to give. Whatever decision you make has to be the best for you and your family. Thinbking of you. Liz (Jasper and Nellie’s mummy)
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Thank you, Liz. I hate having to make a decision that will impact all lives tremendously. I just want her to be loved and everyone to be safe.
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Mom’s eyes are leaking. She knows you are trying hard to do the right thing and we feel your pain. The road dog lovers travel sometimes gets rocky, but we know in the end you will be OK. Molly probably truly felt love for the first time in your care.
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That’s what hurts so much. We want her to be here where we know she will be loved so deeply. But at the same time, I can’t risk losing Noodle. If I lose Noodle, I’ll lose myself. Thank you, friends. 💜
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I commend you on your decision. It is horrible to live in fear. You all deserve better.
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Thank you for the reassurance. I can use all I can get right now. 💜
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Please don’t beat yourself up over this situation. You need to do what is best for Molly and the family. Decisions like the one that you are making are difficult and highly emotional. No one has the right to judge you. Bailey and I hope Molly finds a new home soon and Noodle has a speedy recovery. Take care of yourself.
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Thank you for your kind words. This is VERY emotional and I hate it so much. ❤
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You did not make a crappy decision at all Samantha. You took Molly in with an open heart. Sometimes adoptions do not turn out. Up until 2 months ago I still toyed with the idea of giving Siddhartha Henry back to Mary-Ellen. He just would not settle down & things were tense. I felt all I did was yell at the ‘littul Purrince’. One night things got so bad I crumpled to the bathroom floor & wept…..Siddhartha henry came running in & he sat right beside me….I told him I could not deal with his feral behavior & I loved him so much but would have to send him back to the farm. ….. He actually licked me! The next day he was calmer….now he has the odd little moment of being ‘naughty’ but all the wild feral behavior has vanished. I have no idea how but I sure am glad. Now he sits beside me on couch in evening!!! he never did that before. If I would have had to give him back it would have only been to keep him from being hurt from my frustration & to preserve my sanity.
Don’t get me wrong I am not abusive…..I did have to smack him on his haunches to try & get him to stop climbing the drapes & knocking things over….I felt like he was a prisoner here with me. I felt like a rotten “cat Mum’ & like a HUGE failure. I realize I am NOT a failure or a bad ‘parent’ nor is he a ‘bad’ cat. He has his issues & Molly has hers…both are good 4 leggeds with challenges…. I support your decision 100% & if you need to talk this thru on phone let me know via email your phone # & I will call you…. Please kiss all the dogs for me & see if Greg will give you a {{HUG}} from me ok?
Love S-E.
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I think Macy is the dog version of PSH. I wanted to get stuff of her so bad for the same reasons: I was always yelling at her and feared I would hurt her out of frustration. Having Molly here helped her behavior tremendously. I’m afraid what might happen with Molly gone. Molly is the buffer between Macy and Noodle. That’s a problem for another day I suppose! Lots of love, my friend.
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I agree Samantha! I have NEVER had a partly feral cat before & so I am totally inexperienced with the behaviors & outbursts of ferals. I thought it would be easy to raise him! Boy did I get a B-I-G surprise……
So many bad episodes of climbing the drapes; door dashing; trying to rip the TV cable out of the socket; pulling wires; knocking things down for no reason. Not listening to me. Then the frantic pacing & not realizing Siddhartha Henry was ill…I could not read his body language. I cried ALOT between June & September last year. I was sure I’d loose my tiny mind!
I can ‘read’ him better now & he is on proper med & foods so that has helped with a lot of behaviors & he is slowly maturing…
I know Molly was a ‘buffer’ between Macy & Noodle but at what cost? I think there is a way to keep Macy from driving Noodle crazy & we can brain storm ideas when the time is right. For now you need to be vigilant about Molly so that there is no repeat episode! We sure have our hands full don’t we Samantha???? I am so glad we are friends & can support each other!
(((hugs))) S-E.
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Thank you for keeping me level-headed. Thank you for reassuring me. Thank you for sharing/commiserating. ❤ ❤ ❤
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This was a heavy weight on your heart and it will continue to be for awhile but, if it makes a difference, you have done an honourable thing for your family, in my opinion.
Shoko and mom Jean
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Thank you, ladies! ❤
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Oh, Samantha, don’t second guess yourself. You are doing the right thing by getting her checked out but if the other dogs are at risk you must keep them safe. I’m here if you need to vent or cry. Love, Liz
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I’m really trying not to. If anything happened to Noodle, I just don’t know what I would do. I need to protect everyone. I just wish my heart could understand what my head does.
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Oh Noodle and pack! I am just reading what happened! I am so sorry!!!
Furst, Noodle, dude! I hopes you are healin’ up, and gettin’ lots of extra treaties and margaritas…I knows that always helps me feel betters ☺
Second, I sure hopes there is somethings medically that can help Molly. If not, you will know in your heart what is the right thing. never second guess that instinct.
Third, never feel guilty for doing what is best for your family. Sometimes doggies need to be the only one and don’t like to share….MOI! hehehehe ( okays, so I’ve never known any different, butts I don’t thinks I would like to share at this point! ☺)
Know that you guys are in our thoughts and prayers and I am sendinj’ lots of margaritas your way…☺
Kisses,
Ruby ♥♥
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Number one, thank you for the margaritas. Seconds, please? Number two, thank you for the reassurance. Reading the comments left by our friends is really helping me attempt to be at ease with this decision. Even though we didn’t fail her, it feels like it. You never want to pull a dog from a shelter and have to rehome them. It’s bad enough when someone buys a puppy and does that but to have a dog who already had owners once, maybe twice, it’s just heartbreaking. Thank you, Ruby ❤
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You’re doing the right thing by Molly,She needs the right home for her needs and if that means finding her a home where she is the only pet then so be it.These things happen and sometimes there is now way to predict that this is how it’s going to work out.Good luck in finding that home she deserves to live out her twilight years in.you know you have all of our support,xx Rachel and SPeedy
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Thank you for the reassurance. I really need as much of it as I can get right now. It’s one of those things that you know in your head makes sense but in your heart it feels so wrong. ❤
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I haven’t read the previous post so I don’t yet know what has happened, but I just quickly wanted to drop you a message to say sometimes rehoming a dog is the best option for everybody, no matter how much it hurts…after having to rehome Zoey a week ago, I get that. I also understand how much it tears your heart apart.
I’m so sad for you all because I know how difficult it is, but as long as you examine it from every angle and talk about all possibilities you will know you are doing the right thing.
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I haven’t been on anyone’s blogs in the last week so I didn’t realize you finally rehomed her. I’m so sorry. I know it hurts and I am thankful that I have you by my side for this as you JUST went through it. Is the relief outweighing the grief yet?
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From the second day after we let Zoey go there was huge relief, and as every day has passed since then we have become more certain that we made the best decision for everyone. I haven’t second guessed myself or hated myself half as much as I thought I would…I’ve blamed myself a lot, and thought I failed her a lot, but that was always going to happen!
There have been sad bits where we have cried, and bumping into white SBTs on walks is hard, but we talk about her all the time…which oddly enough really helps.
Thank you. We’re sending you lots of positive vibes on our end.
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Do you plan on visiting her? Getting updates? Or is better to just let her go 100%?
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I think because we’ve also experienced it from the other side (Kasper’s old owner wanted to meet him lots, although never turned up when we arranged times) we don’t want to visit Zoey…I don’t think it’d be fair on her or her new owners, and I don’t think our hearts could take it.
For now we speak with them several times a day, but I’m hoping in a few months time to reduce this, once we’re all certain Zoey’s happy where she is. Eventually I’d just like just a few updates a year, on Christmas / birthdays.
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I just can’t imagine splitting Macy and Molly up permanently. I was thinking of possibly meeting up with whoever get Molly for play dates. Maybe that’s not a good idea though. I don’t know.
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Just do whatever you think is best, that’s all you can do. If you do have to rehome Molly you can always let the girls meet up and, if you feel it isn’t good for one of them, you don’t have to do it again. You know your pups better than anybody else.
Still hoping that there is an easily managed medical reason for this change in behaviour. Reading the newest post it does sound like there could be a physical cause…I hope things work out as well as they can.
Give Noodle some happy gotcha day fuss from us 🙂
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Thanks, Scarlett! ❤
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I hope things work out for the best for all. I do not envy you.
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Thank you ❤
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I know it’s breaking your heart to go through this with Molly but you are truly doing the best thing for your family AND for her. Remember this: You took her into your home and gave her every possible chance to fit in and relax and she did and has – to the best of her ability. You did so much for her and because of that, she has a good chance to live the rest of her life in another home where she can be “queen” of the household and not have to share attention with other animals. Sounds like that’s her best option. Your hearts were in the right place – ABSOLUTELY – and I know this is a very hard thing to have to do, you also can’t be worrying about all your animals when you’re not right there every second to monitor her behavior. It’s the KINDEST and BEST thing to do for everyone. Sending you hugs……….BIG ones!
Love, Pam and Sammy
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I truly don’t know what I’d do without you all. Reassuring me when I need it most. I still can’t help but think that something is medically wrong and perhaps we can fix it. I can’t bear the thought of leaving her behind. Even if it is for the right reasons. ❤
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My tears are running that all this bad things happened… and I understand you… it is so hard to look for another home for Molly, she is one of your furkids… but there is no other thing you can do…. I’m so sad with you and I hope there is a good place for the girl with the big ears where she can be the only kid and where the people love her as much as you and greg… My paws are crossed and I send big hugs your way.
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Easy, the girl with the big ears is Macy and she’s not going anywhere! It’s the brown one that has to find a new home. Regardless of which one it is, it hurts. Bad. Thank you for your hugs and good thoughts ❤
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I know how hard this must be for all of you. But I trust that whatever you decide to do, it will be the best for all of them. Sending furry licks, warm thoughts, and hugs your way. 🙂 -phoebe and samantha
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It’s dreadful. It literally makes me feel sick. Do they make any kind of medicine to make hurting of the soul go away? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Thank you for standing by us ❤
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It really sucks and seems so unfair when you try to do the right thing and it does not work out. You did what your heart told you to, and there is nothing wrong with that. Of course Noodle’s safety has to be your first priority, because he was there first, and even though it is not easy to do, you are doing what is best. Please know we are thinking of you all and praying that you can find the perfect home for Molly soon.
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Thank you, Jan. It really does suck. There is no other way to put it. She’s a good dog who doesn’t deserve whatever happened in her past. Thanks for standing by us ❤
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It’s a tough decision but one you had to make. As one who works in rescue, I know how courageous your decision is. No judgment. Best wishes for you finding Molly’s furever family. Maybe she needs to be an only dog. Lord knows I’ve taken in plenty like her.
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It’s definitely a tough pill to swallow. When I was a child, we had a dog that my dad got rid of because it used to bolt out the door and run for blocks. My dad was afraid that I would watch it get hit by a car. I can’t imagine how hard it was taking his baby girl’s dog away. Sometimes being a grown up flat out stinks!
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We totally understand! We’ve fostered a couple dogs that ended up being too much for us to handle. It absolutely breaks your heart!
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It’s truly a sickening feeling. Especially when I know that if there weren’t other dogs around, she’d be all I could ever ask for in a dog.
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Noodle’s Mom. YOU ARE THE BEST. You rescued Molly from a shelter where she had to be miserable, raised the money to take care of her medical needs, and made her feel loved. You got her ready, whether you intended to or not, to go to another great home, perhaps to someone who doesn’t have the resources you were able to raise to do what had to be done for her. She will be such a great “only” dog for someone, maybe even an older person. You are like a HERO! Oh, and Noodle asked me to ask you if you could find Macy another home while you are at it??? 🙂 *puppy hugs and kisses*
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Wow. I never looked at it like that. Thank you. That really helps to ease my mind. As far as Macy goes…as much of a pain as she is, we really have fallen in love with her and she’s staying. Lots of love little Lexi! ❤
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People like you rarely think about the good they are doing…they are too busy DOING it. That’s one of the things that makes you so special. Oh, about Macy, Noodle said, “Pleeeeeeease?”
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You’re just the sweetest girl in the world. No wonder my boy loves you so much. I truly feel for Noodle about Macy but you know what? When she outgrows this puppy stage, I’m POSITIVE they’ll be besties. Who can stand a puppy? Hardly me…. 🙂
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Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. Given the circumstances it is probably the best decision. You can’t be faulted for trying. We know it won’t be easy but safety is impawtent.
Keep Calm & Bark On!
Murphy & Stanley
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Thank you, boys. Why can’t everything (animal-wise) be sunshine and flowers?
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I had the same thing happen to me when my beloved OES’s passed that Sam was very attached to while she was alive so I adopted a boy through the local OES group (a fabulous organization that have the best interests of their dogs at heart). Long story short, Finn suffered from PTSD from past abuse and while I tried my level best to help him become a self reliant and happy pooch, it was just never meant to be with us. After hundreds of dollars in training, dental work and 6 months, I knew he needed to go back to the rescue folks who graciously took him back and found him a home where he could do the best he could given a;; his PTSD problems. It broke my heart but I have the greatest respect and admiration for those who realize it’s far better to let some of these challenge pets go rather than hanging on to a potentially dangerous situation and everyone suffering. Hugs and prayers to you and yours and best of luck finding Molly a great fur-ever home that she (and you) deserve it! ❤
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Thank you for sharing that with me, Monika. Hearing peoples’ own stories helps my heart realize what my head already knows. ❤
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Oh, I want to give you a big hug and tell you it will all be ok. Give yourself some grace in this. Your heart wanted to help Molly and that is exactly what you did. You could not have known this was going to happen and maybe your role in her life is done now and that is ok. I will be saying prayers for you all that you know what to do and have peace in your hearts about everything.
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Maybe you’re right. Maybe she was here to help us heal from the losses of Mya and Khia. Now she has to go help someone else heal. Thank you ❤
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Lexitheschnauzer said it best – you got her ready for a new home.
When you found Molly she was a dog with heartworm and dental problems that probably scared a lot of people away. Now, she’s just a dog that needs a warm place to lay her head.
And even though things are looking rough right now, during the short few months she was with you, both your lives have changed. She helped all of you adjust to Macy and Macy adjust to you. And you helped her, feel loved and welcome, not to mention the wonderful relief she probably feels from her dental issues. None of that would have happened without you.
There is someone else out there that needs her help too – so its okay. I haven’t know you long, but I can tell you will do right by Molly and make sure she is in the best place possible. And that might not be with all of you, and thats ok. She’ll be ok. And so will you.
So don’t ever second guess taking Molly in, even for such a short time – there are so many positives that outweigh the negative. But sometimes, things don’t work out how you think they will – but it will work out.
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Thank you for writing this. I needed it. This has helped me more than you will ever know. ❤
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You are in my thoughts at this difficult time, there are no other words
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Thank you ❤
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At the risk of someone chewing me out for my honesty here, I wanted to share my experience with Siddhartha Henry with you. I thought he would be like Mingflower was…a quiet calm kitten. What I quickly realized is I compared an apple to a watermelon….
Mingflower did have brain damage so she acted like a kitten all her life; she was a real baby….she was a puppy mill kitten who’d been abused.
Siddhartha Henry was born in a barn to a feral Mother & a Burmese Father…he was always dominant even when he & Tyerrone & Tangerine got so sick. He ‘demanded’ attention! Good thing because he was the sickest of the trio & needed a lot of care. Trouble is he thinks he can be ‘demanding’ now & there is the ‘feral’ factor…some days he is beyond reasoning with….And I have not a clue how to deal with him. As he is my only cat I can deal with him one on one. In your case there is Noodle & Macy & Jamieson so you have a lot more to consider…..I support you 150%. This is a rough situation to be in & I am ‘here’ for you Samantha!
(((hugs))) Sherri-Ellen
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No one would chew you out for this, and if they did, I’d chew them out right back! The best part of blogville is the support we give one another, especially when the odds are stacked against us. You, like me, are doing the best you can. If you can no longer do that, you will know, and as I have to realize, you just need to focus on all you have done for PSH. We took on problem cases knowingly. All we can do is try our best. Thank you for being my friend ❤
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Bless you Samantha! As much as we both had knowledge of Molly & Siddhartha Henry there were surprises for both of us. I knew about his sickness & near death as a kitten so had researched the Rhino & Panleuk thoroughly. What I did not realize was he had permanent bowel damage from the Panleuk & Irritable Bowel Syndrome. (In fairness, his previous owner did not realize he was not 100% either.)
After the Homeopathic debacle & finally getting Siddhartha Henry into a proper Vet for diagnosis & treatment I had to make a decision…
I can not really afford his Probiotic & Vet kibble & wet food plus treats & 2 eye ointments…..however him going back to the barn as a barn cat was unacceptable. So the decision was to keep him & figure out a new budget. A RWB has been assisting with food costs & Sheila puts any Vet visit on her Credit card & I pay her back. His eyes are doing well so I use only a tiny bit of ointment daily.
His previous Mumma comes to visit at least twice a month & she helps me out with treats & litter costs…so I am very blessed.
I am here for you…always…
((hugs)) Sherri-Ellen
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Samantha, you and Greg are saints. I mean that! Don’t feel like you dug yourself into a hole or that you’re failing Molly – you all have been the best thing to happen to her, probably in her whole life. You brought her into your family, you helped to get her well, and you loved her and allowed her to be the dog she was meant to be. Either something is medically wrong (and based on your most recent post, I’d say that’s the most likely explanation) and you can fix it, or she needs to belong to a one-dog home. Either way, you are doing what’s best for her and the rest of your family – never doubt that. You have our email address, so drop us a line if you need to talk! We’re here for you ❤
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Thank you, Samantha. I’m so glad I have this blog to vent on and get feedback. Without it, and without all of you, I don’t know what I’d do! ❤
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I am so sorry u r going through this. We just had the same situation play out only our rescue dog went to attack my other dog and I was in the way. He attacked me and my other dog and my husband as well. We had a trainer coming to our house the next day. It was heartbreaking. Hope this gets worked out and whatever u decide to do know that u did everything possible for her.
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That’s awful. I’m so sorry to hear that. I hope you all are okay physically. I know it’ll take time emotionally. *hugs*
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Thank u! I had to have surgery but am now recovered physically. Emotionally not so much. Both Ghost and Kobi were bully mixes. I love the breed and while it doesn’t change my mind about the breed I am definitely more aware about genetics. I have been researching like crazy and am now a believer in its NOT always how a dog is raised that determines how they will turn out and its not always the owners fault. We did everything we could do for him and in the end he had to be pts. He tried to attack anyone who touched him and also attacked other animals. Hope this doesn’t happen just pls be very careful.
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This breaks my heart. I am so sorry for all of you. Yes, with Molly it’s worse because we don’t even know how she was raised. We got her from the shelter a few months ago and she’s estimated to be around 6 years old. I hope your heart starts to heal. I can’t imagine the pain you feel. ❤
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