Hi, everyone! It has never been my intention to write from my point-of-view on Noodle’s blog but since this is his “diary” of his “adventures” I feel like tonight needs to be documented.
Noodle is in the middle of one of the worst anxiety attacks he has EVER had. Typically unafraid of fireworks or anything else for that matter (other than the car), he is scared out of his mind by them tonight. We thought he was just being silly when he was being a Daddy’s boy after the 2nd one went off:
Now, an hour later and 1 mg of Xanax in, I am hoping he will fall asleep soon. I started out with 1/2 mg Xanax and just as he was starting to doze off, a firework went off and he lost it. He’s been panting non-stop, shaking on and off, and alternating between hot and cold. As someone who personally suffers from severe anxiety/panic disorder, I feel for this poor boy. I know exactly how he feels and it makes me so sad that there is nothing I can do to make him feel better right now. Normally just holding him is enough when he’s having a moment (usually caused by Jamison). I’ve tried putting his jacket on – no help. Wrapped him in a blanket – no help. Opened the closet so he could hide (he’s never done this before but it’s as if he’s looking for somewhere to hide) – he didn’t want to go in. As I type this, he’s on my lap shaking uncontrollably. I am praying and praying and praying that the Xanax will kick in.
Since Noodle and I often feed off of each other’s anxiety, I chose now to type as I was getting more and more upset watching him go through this. Although he’s doing terribly, I feel that it’s helping him somewhat now that my mind is occupied. He is fidgety but he has been on my lap a solid 10 minutes. I’ll take it!
Hopefully Noodle will be feeling better later tonight or tomorrow to tell you all about the last 2 days!
On behalf of Noodle, his Dad, and the rest of the family, we wish you all a happy and healthy New Year!